Today I’m flying from SFB>DSM, and by today, I mean I am currently in the air somewhere of Georgia! Keep in mind I travel nearly every week, or at least every other. I use to fly absolutely everywhere, but now I usually drive. However, this trip I needed to be there and back quickly, and got a pretty good deal. The point is, I’m no stranger to airport issues.
First off, I left my licence in Florida. Or at least I hope I did, quite frankly I have no idea where it is! I had it yesterday, but it’s not where I normally place it so I may have to go get a new one. The issue is that I didn’t figure this out until I was in line for security. I showed them my credit, debit and sail and sign card, all with my name. But none of these have a photo attached. Thankfully my sister had a photo of my passport (Long story, don’t ask) so she ran back into the airport and showed them that. It wasn’t enough, but it did help. They agreed to let me on if I went through a full body pat down and a bag search. Sure, do whatever you need to do, I need to be on this plane.
As I follow the security guard over to the side he asks me to take my belt off, but as I look down I realise something. I’m not wearing a belt… In fact, I’m wearing a cummerbund because I’m in a full tux. Why you ask? Good question. On my way down to Florida, I couldn’t fit my tux in my backpack, obviously. So I went ahead and wore in on board instead. No thinking too much of it, but I was in for a shock. You can wear a full suit anywhere you want and most places won’t blink twice about it. But a tux is different. A tux says I have something to celebrate! By the time I reached the gate I had already been congratulated 17 times, and an additional 14 times by the time I left the airport on the other side. Most of these people didn’t even ask why, they Just said congratulations in passing, which for one is simply odd because I never said anything, they Just assumed. But the few that did ask, I had to have a story for it. “Oh, it wouldn’t fit in my bag” is not very exciting! So I made a plan.
As many of you know I propose to strangers and I always have an engagement ring nearby. So, I pulled on out of my bag and slipped it into my pocket. When people asked why I was wearing a tux, I smiled big and pulled out the ring. “I’m getting engaged, or hopefully I will be anyway. I guess that part’s up to her!” People gushed of the ring and starting asking me all these questions. With every question, I had an answer. “But J, that’s lying!” No, actually it’s not. Every answer I gave was either true or a loophole. I never lied. In order to do the crazy things I do you must be very witty and quick. Skills I’ve built over years of practice. Given that I’ve proposed a few times in the past, I already knew my answers, how to word them and when to say which. I got people congratulating, I got applause. I even got offered a free drink. Being so that this is one of the few airlines that charges you for them, I was pretty proud. But the fun didn’t stop there.
Any line I had to go to, I was instantly in front. Anywhere I went I was a celebrity. Nothing was impossible and I got treated with the utmost respect. Which led me to be curious. If I get all these because I’m going to get engaged, what happens if I Just got engaged? While on vacation I found a girl. Her name was Karson and we got along quite well. It’s a rare find to meet someone you have so much in common with, but it is possible. The one that I found was named Karson. One night Karson and I stayed up nearly all night. Until 7 am, and then we fell asleep in some chairs overlooking the ocean. It was a beautiful night and some of the most fun I’ve had in a while. During that night there was a lad we met on the mini golf course named Alex. He played the Ukulele, and I was quite impressed. I had seen him around a few times before and he already knew I carried this engagement ring. So he pulled me aside and Karson went to gather a runaway ball and ask me “Is this the girl you’re going to propose to? Is she the one?” I quickly, but quietly replied. “I think so, mate. I believe so.” Karson comes back and Alex and I Just look at each other and laugh. She has no idea.
As the night went on Alex ended up leaving, and it was back to K and I. We met up with some friends, played some basketball, ping pong, bean bag toss, volleyball, mini golf, and ate enough ice cream to explode. We wanted to play shuffleboard, but the sticks for that were in a bad place that neither of us fancied to go. Around 9 am we realised a problem. You see, K hasn’t turned 18 yet, so she’s still a minor. Her mother had gone frantically looking for her and ended up having security called for her over the speakers. Which woke me up. In doing so I woke her up and we parted ways. A sad moment, but I always try to live by this quote. “Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened”. Knowing that I was with her last night, security started calling for me… But I had gone into a no speaker zone, so I never heard my own name being called. Eventually, security got to me and I had to fill out some paperwork. Basically saying “Hey, we’re young and had clean fun last night. No we didn’t sleep together, no we weren’t drinking and yes we should have told someone.” As you may imagine, K’s mother was not all too happy with me. But I wrote her a letter and we got everything straightened out. May not be on the best of terms, but I was able to continue having Karson around. Long story short, don’t be stupid. Even when having clean fun, parents tend to worry. We did leave a note on her door and tell her grandma, but alas it wasn’t enough.
A lot of that has got to do with the story too though. Yes, everything I said to her mother and to security was true, and no I wasn’t pulling a loophole or anything. I didn’t need to because nothing bad happened. But I tried seeing it from everyone else’s point of view and it doesn’t sound believable at all! Just think of this – Girl and guy stay out all night long, and void of one photo of us playing bean bag toss, which could have easily been staged, there is no proof of what we were doing all night. Of course, there were cameras is nearly every area, but it didn’t become a big enough deal for us to go through it all. So our families and security ended up believing us, but I’m glad there were cameras in case they didn’t. As many of you know, when I meet new people I like to stay up late with them because it’s the fastest way I’ve found to get to know someone. Filters drop, deeper conversations start, etc. etc. etc. I can explain all the details of that in another post, but the point is, this is what I like to do. But being on the outside, and not knowing my intentions with said new person, especially as a parent. I’m not sure I would have believed what happened at first either. Because it doesn’t sound believable at all! Guy and girl stay out all night playing mini golf and bean bag toss? Met a guy who plays the ukulele and throughout it all nothing physical happened? It Just doesn’t sound believable, and I understand that. But I guess it proves at least one thing. You can have a lot of fun all throughout the night, and here’s the kicker, you don’t need sex or alcohol. Try it sometime, it’s honestly more fun this way.
The next night Alex was with some of his friends and asked if I had done it yet, which is a ridiculously vague question, but I knew what he meant. He wanted to know if I’d proposed yet, which I had… Just not on this particular vacation. So I simply said, “I did, and she said yes” He shakes my hand, gives me a pat on the back and introduces me to his friends. They all ask for details on how long we’ve known each other, how long I’d be thinking to propose, where I got the ring if we’re in Love and of course HOW I proposed. So I sat down and started explaining the whole story, pulling bits and pieces from all true events together to form a new event without a lie. Keep in mind, these people are between 15-17, so they are invested, but have no idea how this kind of thing goes. After I finish the story, the guys are impressed and they girls are melting. They wanted to meet this girl, which I was totally fine with. I Just had to tell her we were engaged first.
I later met up with her and explained that we were engaged. I gave her the ring in the guest services line, and she wore it the rest of the day. I wanted to actually plan out and propose as I usually do, but sadly, there wasn’t any time for all that. *sad face* Those kids never did get to meet my fiancée, as I found them right after dropping K off at her room. But Alex had met her, so he explains how beautiful she was, as I did as well. Everyone is happy and highly intrigued. The next day vacation was over and we were all to leave. Sadly, I never got to see her that day. Though she only lives 5 hours away, so I can go visit whenever I feel. She still holds my ring, though I’m not sure if she’s still wearing it or not. Regardless of it though, I had Just gotten engaged. You see engagements are easy to pull stories about because as long as the other person knows about it, it’s real. There is no law or contract for an engagement. Just two people agreeing on it, which I had. Now, will I ever marry her? I doubt it, but of course, I won’t close that door. I never close that door with people, because things change too much. Maybe Just a wedding, that sounds like fun!
That’s not to say that I like her, despite all the people who’ve been asking me that for the past few days. But that’s also not to say that I don’t. You see romance is a tricky thing, one that has many levels, and there is a friendship level or romance. I like being around her because we get along, I like speaking with her because she interests me and I wasn’t lying before, she is beautiful. But I don’t like vacation relationships and quite frankly, I don’t think we’d work out anyway, so I keep everyone as a friend or less. It’s less confusing this way. Plus it doesn’t make me look like some kind of player. I’m a Social Alpha, I talk to a lot of people and thus I walk around with different people a lot. I had a guy come up to me on the last morning on my vacation with that stupid cheesy grin and he gets real close to say this “Man, I’ve seen you walking around with a new girl every night! I only got one girl to sleep with me here and you’re getting new tail every night. How do you do it?” So I’m thinking “Okay, um, douche. Pardon, drunk douche” – But what I said was more along the line of this. “I’m not chasing “tail”, okay? I am Alpha, we meet a lot of people, but we don’t sleep with every girl we meet. Yes, I got two not-so-subtle offers this week, but I didn’t take either one of them up on it. For there is another thing Alpha’s have, respect. Plus, I actually Just got engaged. I want to happy for the rest of my life, not working every night for meaningless sex. But best of luck to you anyway” He looked dumbfounded. So utterly stumped he couldn’t speak. But when he finally did he replies “Man, you’ve got it figured out. I know it’s all meaningless sex, but what else can I do? Love is too damn hard.” Well, that was not the reaction I was expecting. I offered him some advice and he seemed quite interested. Most of the time these guys Just go “Whatever” and walk away. But this guy came to a realisation, which is good. Not sure who he is, what his name is or if he stuck to any of the things he said he would, but if he did, props to you, man.
A few hours before my flight I decided to wear my tux again and try this social test once more. I’m not getting engaged, I Just got engaged. To no surprise at all, this gives you even more access. Void of the security pat down (Obviously, security has to come before romance at an airport. Though the guy did ask me afterwards and congratulated me all the same.) I got to cut lines, I got special seating. There was a delay for an oil filter replacement, so they came right to me asking they could get me some water or anything to make me more comfortable. I ended up getting a free drink. Anything I wanted off the menu and got to get off the plane first. Though I didn’t use that last perk as I was still talking with some of the people around me. But it really has led me to know something. People Judge, always. But not always in a bad way. I got special treatment because I wore a tux and gave away a ring. Others get yelled at hated upon because they don’t know how to express themselves. So, stop Judging people. We all come from somewhere, we’re all headed somewhere. So let’s work together and get where we’re going, stop wasting your time hating on others. It’s not good for either of you.
Another thing I don’t understand is why people get so mad at what they can’t change. We pulled out for a moment and had to pull back to change that oil filter I was talking about. Is it inconvenient? Sure. Is it going to mess us up on the other side? Yes! If your whining and bickering about the problem going to make this trip any better or change that oil filter any faster? No. So, so being loud and rude and Just sit back. You know full well if you have a connection flight they’ll rebook you. You’re not losing any money, and so what if you had to sit on a plane. Listen to some music, read a book, meet a stranger! Do anything but bicker, because this who delay is to save your life, and you’re upset about that then you need to get off this plane right now. I even met a girl with a little black dress with the words “Choose Happiness” on it. I Love it, and I made a point to mention that! But she wasn’t very happy about the delays. Meanwhile, I’m up in my seat reading Captivate – Vanessa Van Edwards and cracking up! I’m not happy because I got some special treatment for the tux, I’m happy because there is no reason not to be. Live happy, because it’s the only way to enjoy life. It doesn’t matter if you never went to college, or even if you were a high school drop out. Knowledge is good, but learning to be happy in any circumstance… That’s priceless. So do yourself and me a favour. Smile, right now. Hold it for 10 seconds, and then be happy. I assure you one thing. It’s worth it. 🙂
PS: If you own a tux and have a trip coming up, wear it! The reactions are great, you’ll get better service and come off with plenty of stories! Maybe even with the girl, you will actually marry someday.
PPS: The girl with the “Choose Happiness” dress was probably the maddest person on that plane. I was waiting in the airport people watching as everyone else got off and she came straight up to me and does that hushed yell thing saying “That was fucking miserable” and stomps off. I Just smile and wave, and as soon as she’s out of earshot I burst out laughing. I’m still cracking up about it! I really, and I do mean really wanted to get a photo with her, Just do the sheer irony of her dress. But alas, I didn’t want to anger her anymore, and due to legality I’m not supposed to post those pictures on my blog anyway, and the photo wasn’t worth it Just for me. Oh, but I wanted to! Just for the memory of it. It was hilarious! 10/10 would recommend! I do really want a shirt with that saying on it though, it’s good. I like it!